Being Perfect is Overrated

Have you ever noticed that sometimes no matter how much we do, it’s never enough?  The people around us, the people closest to us, are still wanting more, expecting more.  As I began to seek the Lord on how to end the endless cycle of killing myself to make everyone happy and still falling short, I realized many times there was a motivation behind my actions – Yes, I wanted my family and friends to feel loved and cared for but in reality I think I wanted love in return and was trying to prove myself worthy of that love. 

When I was talking to God about this, He took me to Hebrews 10.  In this scripture it talks about the annual sacrifice that was given for our sins and how that sacrifice cannot make us perfect and how the annual ritual itself is just a reminder of how we’re not perfect and can’t be perfect, or else there would be no need for the sacrifice.

That’s the case with us trying to earn love; to deserve love.  Every time we sacrifice too much to try to prove ourselves, it’s a reminder of how imperfect we are.  We can never be perfect enough.  Love is not something that can be earned, it is a gift freely given.  Perfection does not even factor into it and if it’s a requirement, then it’s not love, in the true sense of the word. 

My point in writing this is that sometimes, don’t you get tired of having to be “on” all the time- constantly trying to do it all, leave no stone unturned, cover all your bases, to think of everything.  I know I do.

In this class I took they said “Grace without mutuality is enabling”.  I think that is a good measure to determine where our “off” switch should be.  If you feel like you have to prove yourself worthy of someone’s love, you may very well be enabling them to carry on and not love you unconditionally.  If they don’t reciprocate or if you’re always having to forgive or overlook their shortcomings and the grace doesn’t flow both ways, you're enabling them to treat you in a way that is not edifying to both of you.

But how about if it’s just something inside of you, something from your past, where you weren’t loved without conditions (and I use the word “love” loosely here).    In Hebrews 10:18 it says “Now where there is remission of these, there is no longer an offering for sin.  What this means to me, in the context of this writing, is that when there is true love, no sacrifice (proving of worthiness) is required.  We need to get this thing or we’ll wear ourselves out trying to earn something that is already ours.

 

“Dear Lord, help us seek out and find the motivation behind our actions.  Lord, where there is a feeling of unworthiness; of needing to prove ourselves; the desire to be perfect, I ask that you bind that thing and fill that space with the assurance that we are loved by the most high God.  That we cannot make ourselves perfect and are only made perfect in you.  That we are worthy of love and we do not have to earn it, we only have to love,  according to your word and your way.  I thank you and praise you in Jesus precious name.  Amen”

 

“The gift is not the gifts she gives, but the gift she is J”